growinghumans


An open letter to the people who talk to my Tiny Human:
January 9, 2015, 3:33 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

parenting-talking-to-child

I see what you are doing.

Or, rather, I hear what you are doing.

Last weekend, my Tiny Human came back home after spending a few days with her grandparents; we had taken down the Christmas tree, added a new chair, and generally cleaned up the entire house.

Here is a sample of what my 4 year old Tiny Human said to me, upon entering the house:

“Wow, this looks wonderful!”

“What a beautiful chair! Did you pick it out yourself?”

“How did you take down the tree by yourself? You must be amazing.”

“Thank you for cleaning my room. You’re a great helper.”

What adults don’t often realize when they are talking to children is that they are forming that child with their very own words.

My child is walking around and what most people see is a child, but I see a container full of love. Someone, or everyone, is talking to my child in a way that she feels loved, safe, and proud. Her self esteem is being built. Her life is being reinforced. And she is passing it on to the people around her.

Her kind words made me cry.

Often times, or all of the time, we worry about how our children will “end up”–about whether or not they will be kind and gentle to those around them. Instead of harboring that worry, I need to be more like the other adults who talk to my child.

I need to be what I want my child to be.

So, the next time you are speaking positively to a child, any child, know that you are also speaking to that child’s parents. You are telling them “Don’t worry. Everything is going to be wonderful.”

You are filling that child’s container with everything they will need to be a light in the world; the kind of person who will someday kneel down and speak kindly to another child.

And I thank you, from the very bottom of my heart–my own container, for that.

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1 Comment so far
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You are amazing. What wonderful perspective, what a wonderfully written post with which to share it.

Comment by W




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