growinghumans


My Sister Had a Baby
December 11, 2015, 10:40 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

I got the call Sunday night, around 9:30.

My little sister’s water had broke and they were on their way to the hospital. I hunkered down for a long night of correspondance. I changed my phone tones so that if I happened to drift off to sleep, I would immediately wake up if an update came through.

My brother in law did not miss a beat. He let me know every time they moved, every time she dilated, every time she needed something.

I lay in bed, through the wee hours of the night and clutched my phone, knowing that this was as close to being there that I could possibly be. I felt small.

Finally, at 6, I dragged myself out of bed and brushed my teeth. I had to go into work, staying at home and resting  and waiting was not an option that day. Things were progressing, but slowly, and I had hopes for a longer labor so that I wouldn’t miss the moment. I had a long labor and perhaps my sister would follow in my footsteps.

By the time I got to work, frazzled and high on adrenaline, she was at 5 centimeters. An hour later she was at 8, and I started to panic.

Less than an hour later my little sister dilated to 10 centimeters and began pushing.

I panicked. I wasn’t ready. I wanted to be in a room, alone. Not in a noisy classroom, surrounded by other people who needed things from me at that moment.

I needed to close my eyes and send my strong energy to my sister as she began this last and more horrendous part of her journey.

My brave, warrior little sister, did not need my thoughts.

She labored for less than 12 hours. She endured relentless contractions from the moment she was admitted to the hospital. She did all of this without the aid of any sort of medication.

And she pushed out her glorious daughter by 9 am the next morning.

I was sent a text, a picture, “She’s here.” I didn’t know what to do. I stood very still and felt how different the world felt suddenly now that this perfectly formed little person was now taking up space. It felt different.

States away, far from my grasp, my little sister lay in her bed with her baby and her husband and blissfully nursed her.

Everything had gone to plan. If you held up her birth plan like a check list, all of her points would be checked off.

My sister, my brave little sister, fought for this child. She fought through the pregnancy and did everything she was supposed to do–she did yoga, attended classes, read books. She was bullied for her weight gain from her original doctor’s office but eventually found a group who embraced motherhood for what it really is. All through this, all the long nine months, she was adamant:

I am going to have her naturally. I am going to push her out. I am going to breastfeed.

She willed it into existence. She had her birth moment that so many mother’s are robbed of. I am in awe

awe

absolute awe

of my sister, her body, and this small little person that I can now call my niece.

 

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